heaven or is it ?
by fuddersox
Summary: a teenage girl recounts her NDE   submitted for coursework, review and comment.   any changes suggested? need reply's before november.


Heaven? Or something else?

I woke up; it felt like a dream, the last thing I remember is the pain in my chest and the world going fuzzy. I stood up and looked around me, it was blank and empty. I was lonely; the only thing in the space was a solitary window. I looked through it and saw myself lying on the floor in a pool of blood. I couldn't stand it no more; I shut the window and slumped on the floor. I stayed there for a few moments staring at the emptiness.

_This can't be heaven, _I thought_ it is too bland and boring, heaven is said to be a nice, calm, relaxing place. There is supposed to be pearly gates, well they obviously got it wrong!_

When I finally decided to get back up I felt an uncontrollable force trying to keep me down on the floor so I tried again to get up, and again it tried to pull me down. I didn't want to go back down onto the floor so I tried again and suddenly I felt like a weight was lifted from me. I went to the window again but instead of seeing my body, I saw clouds and fields. I looked around and everything had changed, the room was still empty but it felt happy. I didn't feel lonely and sad anymore. I went back to the window, the scene was so beautiful. Everything seemed so nice. I opened the window expecting to be able to smell the fresh air but I couldn't smell anything, it didn't bother me though. It was peaceful, it felt like nothing could go wrong and that is when I saw it…

A door to the outside I was free from this place. I went to the door and opened it… only to find a brick wall _No!_ I thought _I can't be trapped here!_ I had an incontrollable urge to scream but I held it in, I didn't want to go back onto the floor. _This may be a nuisance but there is no point getting angry and upset about it._ I calmed myself down and thought about where I was. I looked back around me; there was a window at one side of the space and a door at the other. I thought about how I could escape but everything I tried didn't work. After what seemed like a long time I gave up and tried to make the most of my time here. It still felt like I was in solitary confinement but at least there was plenty of light.

_Maybe I am not in heaven at all,_ I thought,_ what if I'm in purgatory?_ I wondered but with my doubt came the force trying to pull me to the floor again. I fought against it. Finally, I realised that unhappy emotions triggered the force and started thinking about things I like. It made me feel good again and the force pulling me weakened enough to break free. I felt a lot better than I did so I went back to the door.

I opened it to reveal a busy street. It felt like home. I stepped into the crowds. After a few minutes I reached a large park, there were trees and flowers. There were a few people walking dogs and sitting on park benches. The strangest thing about the park was a small help desk. I thought it may help me so I walked up to it to ask where I was when I saw my brother at the desk.

"Hello, how can I help you?" he said

"James? Where am I and how did I get here?" I asked

"You are at 55 Park Street, Heaven, you wished you were here and you were brought here." He replied

"James, you died a year ago how come you don't look the same?"

"I'll tell you when I get off work; I'll meet you at your home."

"Why are you working here?" I asked

"I needed something to pass the time," he said

"How do I get home?" I asked

"Just think about home," he said

"What?" I asked

"Just do as I say and think about home," he replied

"Ok, see you later," I said as I turned and walked away. I went back to the busy street and a few minutes later I arrived back where I started out side the door. I opened the door and stepped inside the room. _At least I have my twin brother with me,_ I thought as I shut the door behind me. I looked around the room, it seemed different, I don't know why. It seemed like all the darkness had left and was filled with light. I looked around to see if I could see my brother, he wasn't there so I sat on the floor and waited. I couldn't feel anything trying to pull me down anymore so I was relieved.

A few minutes later there was a knock on the door. I stood up and opened it. My brother stepped in. "This place is so bland," he said as he looked around.

"I know, James, is your home like this?" I asked,

"No, my house is nice and relaxing, would you like to come and live with me?"

"I don't know, James, I think I'd prefer it here, I'm not sure about anywhere else. This place is so strange to me."

"Oh come on, Laura,"

"Ok I will because we're family."

"Right, I said I would tell you about here, well, as you know we are in heaven. Though it is not as you would expect," he said

I just nodded.

"You are one of the lucky ones who managed to get here, heaven is so packed, people are starting to get rejected by heaven for having bad thoughts," he added.

"So that force trying to pull me down…"

"That was the devil trying to get you to have bad thoughts so that didn't get into heaven." He turned to leave "You comin'?" he added. I joined him and he opened the door, "Keep hold of my hand," he said as we went back out into the street.

As we walked I looked at my brother. He seemed older and wiser now. Thinking about it; he was different, the last time I saw him was about a year ago, he was in hospital, he had been hit by a truck. He was hooked up to a life support machine, he hadn't woken for about six months and there was no prospect of him ever waking up. The next day my mum and dad told me he died in the night. He looked better now, he was happy.

"We're here," James said as we arrived outside a big old house. "Just go through the door here and sit down, I'll be there in a bit." I went into the other room, it was surprisingly large. There were six large sofas circling round the room. I sat down on the nearest sofa and looked at the picture he had on the wall. It was a big mural of people surfing. It was such a nice clean place; the walls were painted light blue. I didn't notice that James had come into the room until he sat next to me and said, "I miss my life but it is nice here." I just stared at him blankly; I didn't understand what he meant. "Why don't you go and look around, just don't get lost … oh and remember to think about here when you want to go home." He said as he opened the door and left. _I might as well go out and look around here_. I thought. I stood up and walked to the front door and back onto the busy street. Everyone seemed to be happy walking through the crowds. I looked around as I passed little coffee shops and restaurants. People were sitting, chatting and eating.

Slowly, I came out onto a town square. It looked a lot like the town square I used to go to with my mum and dad at Christmas. There was a big statue in the middle of the town centre. The statue was of the Greek goddess Athena. It felt a bit out of place in the busy streets. I turned and stepped back into the crowds again hoping to find the park.

I passed more cafes and houses. After what seemed like an hour I came to the park again, the trees had blossom on now; it was light and fluffy like a cloud. It seemed to cling to the trees like a person clinging onto life.

There were few people walking dogs because of the cold wind. It whipped at my face and sent shivers down my spine. It reminded me of autumn when James was throwing leaves at me; it reminded me of happier times, because after James died nothing was the same for my family. My mother slipped into a depression, she was constantly drowning out her sorrow with alcohol. My father left and I never saw him again. To be honest I was happy that I died.

The flowers in the park were just blooming they were lush red, sunshine yellow and sky blue. I walked towards the help desk were I first met my brother, I looked in but there was nobody there so I left and walked down a path. I came to a sign post, there was an arrow pointing towards the trees the writing was scrubbed out but I followed it; I was intrigued by what I might find.

It seemed like I was walking for hours, I couldn't see the path anymore, all I could see was the trees. They were no longer covered in blossom, the leaves were so thick that they blocked out most of the sun. I didn't think this was such a good idea anymore, _no wonder the writing was scrubbed out,_ I thought. I turned around and tried to head back the way I came but with every turn I became more lost. I kept walking no matter what because _eventually,_ I thought, _I would stumble on to the path again._

I walked for as long as I could. I could feel the strength draining from me when I reached the edge of the wood; the sun was shining on me as I ran towards the grass and then I collapsed. I was exhausted. I fell into a deep sleep.

When I awoke there was snow on the ground. I knelt up and looked around. I could see the sign post that I passed, in the distance, behind me the trees had no leaves and looked eerie with all the snow piled on their bare branches.

I stood up and headed for the sign post, _just maybe it will lead me home,_ I thought. I walked up to it and looked around me; I didn't recognise anything. I was hoping too see a sign of life anywhere; that's when it hit me, I would never see my family again. I dropped to my knees and wept. I was alone again, isolated from my brother and all life, in heaven.

"Laura…Laura…Laura" I heard. It was faint. I called out and using all my strength. I stood up and looked around me for the source of the sound; I saw a tall figure in the snow. I shouted and waved to get their attention, and then I collapsed as the figure came close to me.

When I woke I was in a hospital room, my brother was standing next to me and there was my mother and father stood at the entrance of the room, talking to a doctor. "She's awake." I heard my brother say. Everyone crowded around me.

"Are you ok? We thought we'd lost you!" my mother said slowly.

The doctor approached me, he cradled my hand in his own and said softly "you have been in a long coma, don't worry, you should be fine." He released my hand and let my family come closer.

"What happened? James you're supposed to be dead." I said wearily.

"Don't be silly dear; you have been in a coma for about ten months." My father said.

"But I heard you say James was hit by a truck and was in a coma and died." I said slowly

"Yes he was in a coma and he was hit by a truck, but I never said he died to you, I said that Jamie our old next door neighbour died. I didn't think you could hear me as you were in a coma". He replied

"What happened?" I asked.

"You were both hit by a truck but James came out of his coma about two months ago, however you sustained worse injuries." My mum said.

Two weeks later I was finally allowed home. My brother told me in private that he remembered everything. I went back to school two days later and told my story…

"And that's was my near death experience, I hope you all enjoyed it." I finished.

"Now class, tomorrow we will hear Jake's story." Miss Jameson added.

By Rebecca Revell


End file.
